March 6th, 2010 started just like any other Saturday. We both slept in, I fixed a big french toast breakfast, and we just relaxed. I wanted to get a haircut, so I started calling places to see if anyone had openings for later that day. (I was super nervous because I wanted a huge change!) I was also going to get my nails done, on Rob's request. :) So, in my mind, it was going to be an awesome day. Rob had to be to work at 2, and for some reason, he wanted me to take him in that day. When we pulled into his parking lot, our lives changed.
Rob's dad called me, and I was driving, so I passed the phone over to Rob. I couldn't hear David, and Rob wasn't saying much, but I could tell it was kind of a serious conversation. I pull into a parking spot because Rob was still on the phone, and that's when it happened. I heard the worst thing I could have heard at that time. All I remember was Rob saying "No" over and over. It took me a few times to realize he was repeating the same word, because I wasn't really listening to the conversation. Then all of the sudden, it hit me. "No, no, no..." Rob's reaction could only have been caused by one thing, and I knew it. I broke down!
Our dog, Chuck, had been killed.
Chuck, our yellow lab, who was 2 1/2 years old, lived on Rob's family's farm. If he wasn't so big, we would have had him with us, in Provo, but he needed space to run. He'd lived up there for a year and a half, and Rob and I had Chuck for almost 2 years. Chuck was the most gentle dog I have ever known, and never wanted to harm anyone. All he ever wanted to do was play. He was so gentle that he wouldn't ever jump on the couch. He climbed. One paw at a time. I think he was worried about hurting us.
Well, this Saturday morning, Chuck was let out of his pin, and just let free. He was really good about staying on the farm, or close to it, so he hardly needed to be tied up anymore. From what I've been told, Chuck was only gone for 20-30 minutes, when his family got a phone call from the sheriff.
Paraphrasing: "Uh, yes, I had to put your dog down this morning. He was attacking a deer with another dog. Do you want us to dispose of the body?"
I am so grateful that I was not the one who answered the call. I'm grateful my phone number wasn't on Chuck's tag anymore, because I don't know what I would have done. I am also grateful that I wasn't there when it happened, because I would have wanted to see my puppy, and then my memories of him would have been scared forever of his poor, lifeless body.
A home owner at the base of the mountains in Huntsville had called and reported that two dogs were chasing a deer behind his house. The sheriff came out, called fish and game, and was told to put the dog down. The sheriff was about to walk to his car at the front of the house to get his rifle when the home owner said "I have one inside." "Ok, go get it," was the sheriff's response. This home owner chose to shoot Chuck first. After the shot, the other dog ran away and the deer continued to run away. (We just don't understand why he couldn't shoot a warning shot. Chuck was such a scardy cat that he would have ran right away! And also, why did Chuck have to be the dog he chose first? If he had chosen the other dog, someone else would be without their dog, but at least we would still have ours. When things like this happen, it is so easy to think "Why me?" Or "What if..." but eventually you just have to move forward.)
All of this happened within the 20-30 minutes Chuck was gone! No one can believe that all this took place in that short amount of time, and most everyone feels like things were not handled correctly, however, we all gave up fighting and just tried to move on. Nothing could bring Chuck back.
Chuck was like our child. Rob and I are the type of people that truly love their pets as humans. Some think this is a terrible thing to do, but when it's just Rob and I in our little family, with our dog Chuck, he becomes like our child. Had this relationship not been so deep, it probably would have been easier to move on. But we also would not have known him or his love as well as we did.
Back to March 6th, I broke down. I was sitting in front of Rob's work, with him in the car, and we were a mess. I have never seen Rob cry, except because of this. Rob sat with me for 10-15 minutes, but had to go into work. I was such a mess that Rob didn't even want me to be alone. Rob worked for a few hours, then got someone to cover for him, and came home for a few hours to be with me. Then had to go back to work to finish his shift and close the store.
I canceled my huge hair cut I was going to have. I just didn't want it. All I did that day was lay in my bed, crying. There was nothing else I wanted to do. I remember trying to fall asleep, but I was so upset, that I couldn't even take a nap. Rob insisted that I still get my nails done because it would help me take my mind off things. It might have a little, but definitely didn't help much.
I don't remember how we got through this. I think I just kept telling myself that Chuck wasn't really killed, and he wasn't really dead. He just wasn't with us anymore. I think that was probably a horrible way to deal, but it was the only way I knew how.
There were so many good things about Chuck, the entire family on the farm was devastated. It's all anyone talked about for days. But, just like trying to fight that things weren't handled correctly, everyone just decided it was time to move on.
I gave up hoping that I could somehow have justice, because all I wanted was my dog back, and no matter what happened, I knew that would never happen.
This time was a really hard time in our lives. It was the hardest thing we have ever had to go through. The thing that made it most difficult for me was I felt like my dog was murdered. I just wanted revenge. It was really hard trying to move on. I also just wished I had been a better owner. I wish that I could have prevented this from happening, and Rob and I felt like it was our fault. I also wish I could have just been there for Chuck. He was just a helpless dog and when this happened, he was all alone.
The only thing that makes us smile from this is that at least he was having fun. He was doing what he loved most. Chasing animals in the mountains.
March 6th, 2010 was officially the worst day of my life.
Chuck's last two pictures.
Chuck's pawprints found the day after he died on Rob's front porch.
We secretly wanted to put some kind of a sealing on the cementso we could have a part of Chuck with us forever.
Where Chuck currently "sleeps".
On a brighter side, Rob and I both decided that we are so grateful we were able to spend the time with Chuck that we had. We wouldn't give it up for anything, even if it meant he wouldn't have died. We would never trade the memories we have of him! He will be with us forever, and someday, hopefully he'll be with us again.
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